In Chicago I am Single

MK-Street-Walking-Chicago-WInter

My love language
is a screen full of tinder messages:  
hey baby- ❤ – let’s get drinks- tell me about yourself – let’s go out- let’s fall in love- let’s get married and have a dog be the ring bearer- make it a golden retriever- lets buy a cottage together – paint the edges blue – lets wake up in each other’s arms- cotton sheets- lets die this way – let’s taxidermy our remains and keep them on the same shelf.  

We can be this way together.
Here we can be together.
But not on bumble because it is too much work for me,
in this world, men scare me every day
  the last thing I want to do is make the first move 
be blamed for my own body bag.  

In Chicago, my Aries moon shows,
if you don’t know what that means it means
that I smile at boys on the sidewalk
because I know they want me too and later 
I will tell my friends about it. 
It means that when people compliment me   

I tell them they are right like, I have already read this book.
A boy dares himself to find something 
about me that I do not already like
I beat him in a thumb war.
In Chicago, the bold parts of me protect the soft.
Here, the same boy gets bored because boys   

are always bored because there are so many
beautiful women and so many men 
that can make them laugh.
Here I don’t know what breathing feels
like because I live with butterflies, mostly monarchs
in my stomach. With my heart caught in my throat.  

This is how I fit into a new place,
this is how the city knows me.

Sierra Kruse (She/Her) is a poet and performer from Portland, OR. Currently she is located in Chicago studying theater at Columbia College Chicago with a focus on education and cultural discourse. In her poetry Sierra focuses on the female experience, Specifically the balance between modern candor and poetic beauty.