When I Think About Me… I Touch Myself.

Female-Masturbation-sex-positive-megan-convey Artwork : Megan Convey

First off all, here is some awesome music to listen to while we get down to the nitty gritty…

Masturbation is natural. Let’s just get that out of the way right now. It’s not dirty, it’s not sinful, it’s fucking great. Not only are you getting yourself to an awesome orgasm, but you’re also learning about your body. By pleasuring yourself you are going to know exactly what you want out of a sexual partner, how you want to be touched, where you want to be touched, what kind of stimulation is going to get you off.

Also, masturbation is an amazing way to get to know your body. Once you know yourself on an intimate level you can start learning how to be comfortable with how you look naked… and clothed. Masturbation is how I learned exactly what I need in order to orgasm and it’s also how I learned that my body looks pretty damn good in candlelight. Yes, people… set the mood for yourself! Not only will it feel more comfortable — it’s also sexy as hell to look good for no one else but you.

Now, let me be honest masturbation hasn’t always been a pleasant experience for me. When I was a teen, just learning about the concept it absolutely terrified me. Uh, I’m not supposed to touch myself… there. My brain was honestly blown… I didn’t know it was possible and when I first tried it I spent the next week feeling guilty and dirty. I also spent time in a relationship where I often felt it wasn’t important for me to feel good, it was about him and that’s all I should care about. Luckily I grew up with a sister who is very comfortable with her sexuality and when I talked to her about things she set me straight. Not only that masturbation great, but also that it is about me when I’m in a sexual relationship – it’s about both of you… ALL THE TIME.

In the past year I have learned that ‘me’ time is also a good time to experiment with toys, lubricants and yes, even pornography. Take the time to really understand who you are sexually, what turns you on and I can guarantee you will be so much more comfortable asking a partner for specific things in bed. And your partner will thank you for being open and honest with them about what you like and dislike in sexual situations.

The act of masturbation is not only for single people. If you are in a relationship you bet your ass you better still be masturbating. It’s a time to reconnect with your body and keep in touch with what you want. It’s also proven that orgasms are an epic way to decrease your stress. You can also masturbate with your partner, maybe it sounds strange but it’s also an extremely intimate way to get to know your lover. I’ve finally come to understand that sex is fun when you have a partner who you can be open and experiment with.

If you are in a relationship you should also feel comfortable talking with your partner about masturbation. You should never feel ashamed or dirty about it, chances are your SO is doing it too. If you have open and honest communication about your own sexual health with the person you’re with you can pretty much guarantee that your sex life together will only get better and better. Own your body and your sexual path – it’s sexy as hell.

Colleen Rae : Artist. Writer. Feminist. Wizard.