‘Tis the season when we head back home to our old stomping grounds.
The holiday magic is in the air. Old friends come back home from all places far and wide and you begin to rekindle the friendships right where you left off the last time you were all in the same zip code. The smell of sweet treats and holiday meals fill the air while glasses clink celebrating an end of a year and family togetherness. The time with family is always enjoyable and stressful, but family time also brings forth interrogation.
What is your major?
When will you graduate?
Any thought about graduate school?
What is it you do again?
How is your job search?
Have you applied to any positions recently?
What’s your plan for the coming year?
Are you still single?
Are you dating anyone?
These are the dreaded questions I face every time I go home for the holidays. There always turns out to be some “discussion” about my life and how I am living it at the present time. When these questions are brought up, I am able to answer them in the only way I know how to – truthfully.
Yassss, I’m still single.
[Internal Monologue] Single? Yes! I’m single! S-I-N-G-L-E Sorry, some guys are just douches and not worthy of me. I am a prize. I am queen. And SORRY I am not one of the numerous people in my newsfeed announcing they are engaged. *takes another sip*
I smile to family member and say, “So if you know anyone single and who has a job… let me know!”
Yeah, right now still working two retail jobs to make rent, pay bills, and attempt to have a social life.
[Internal Monologue] Oh, the job search, it is incredibly daunting. And people say I can’t take rejection. Wish they would have told me that EVERYONE would have the same degree as I do! OH NO, it is NOT a competitive time to be a PR major who is concentrating on social media. *eye roll*
I smile and nod intently at family member and say, “The right opportunity has not presented itself yet!”
These conversations weigh on me. While the rest of my family members are in attendance with their significant others being all cute and couple-y, I want to go around the corner and throw up. I sit on the couch, sticking out like a sore thumb. Yes, I am the one person in the family who is not dating and did not bring anyone home for the holiday… for yet another year.
Comments made by family will eat me up on the inside. My life choices are questioned immensely. Family time is by no means a confidence booster. Even hanging out with people I have known for years is weird because of these same discussions. I feel as though my life has not progressed as much society wants it to. The conversations remind me how far off I am from society’s life plan for me. Here’s what I have to say to about that: I do not follow plans – I make my own.
This year, I want going home to be different. In the past year, I have discovered so much about myself, who I am, and what I want in my life. I am content with my life. It is never easy – some days, it truly sucks. Everything may be up in the air, but that is exciting because I am open to ANYTHING. I am my own person. I can do what I what, when I want. I am living my life for me, myself, and I. I’ve got aspirations and I will get it done.
Listen up family and friends: I am single and do not have my dream job, but I am enjoying life at the moment. Be happy for me.